And then, it rained

I am running out of wide eyed wonder and small happiness. I wonder if it is age or the desperate need to go where the streets have no name.


Even a place where everybody knows my name would do. I want Bombay, its people, and its energy around me RIGHT NOW.


I want to wrap Bombay around myself and take it with me wherever I go.


I am "homesick".


I was not so incapable of being nice in Bombay. Never told an auto driver what a chutiya he was. Even after a 1 hr commute. Coz they weren't.


I even miss the auto drivers of Bombay. That's how much I miss that city.


With all its rain and trees and slow pace, it's just not Bombay. How can I EVER forget that. Rains don't last, friends do.


"We’re just a bunch of punchline peddlers hoping to run away from our inner voices." Well said @gkhamba. This holds true not only for comics


@asashutosh the weather's nice?


@asashutosh not outside my window yet.. gotta give it another hour.


@asashutosh iss migrain mein beer day manaya toh death anniversary bhi aaj hi manegi :P i just want to go home, have some chai, and sleep!


And then, it rained.


After a day of existential angst and migraine, it rains. God, you are somewhere up there and you are a good man.

Status update

If this blog had something like a status update, mine would read something like this..

Na maen andar ved kitaab aan,
Na vich bhangaan na sharaab aan,
Na vich rindaan masat kharaab aan,
Na vich jaagan na vich saun,
Bulleh! Ki jaana maen kaun…

Na maen shaadi na gham naaki,
Na maen vich paleeti paaki,
Na maen aabi na maen khaki,
Na maen aatish na maen paun.
Bulleh! Ki jaana maen kaun…

While we are at it, I could may be even sing this..
Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
I'm closer to where I started
Chasing after you..

I guess that says it all? On an aside, or may be not, difficult decisions are easier made than lived. I guess.

Disclaimer: Even as I write this, R is playing DJ - blame him for bringing this on :P

Being A

Imagine A. She watches an episode of Indian Idol on a 17'' monitor on youtube, and not even on full screen on it mind you, and sobs like there is no tomorrow. And no, this was not when Her Bihari got voted out. This was when Rakesh Maini's parents came on stage. And A doesn't even like Rakesh Maini.

Do you think A has lost it beyond hope?

Say yes. Just say yes. Why do you think she is telling the world about it here? Because 'losing it' is probably all she has. Quite an irony, that. No?

I am my mom - II

When spending the entire Saturday morning and a huge chunk of the afternoon cleaning the kitchen like a vacuum cleaner on fire and making mental notes of how much Tupperware shopping you need to do, gives you the biggest kick of your Saturday, you know you are your Mom. And there is never going to be any running away from it. Why run when you can just stay. And clean. From having weekend-long arguments with Ma about the amount of time she spent in the plastic dabba section of Big Bazaar to planning Tupperware shopping on a Saturday morning, it has been an interesting ride. Unlikely, but interesting.

Cleaning. Microwaving. And gallons of tea and Ultra and bakar to go with it. And the breeze and the grey clouds, and the possibility of a very beautiful evening. What a lovely Saturday. I am not even kidding :D

Image courtesy: http://www.foodstorageplace.com/

The ogling diaries - 1

As luck would have it, after quitting the company that we worked for, R and I now have offices right opposite to each other's. So often when I go down for a quick break, I see him on the other side of the road. Talking and laughing and more often than not, dispensing gyaan. I have to say this, he really is the cutest! :P (That I am saying this one whole year after the big fat Bihari wedding doesn't make you want to pull my leg, does it? If I were you, I would have. Mercilessly. But I don't want a taste of my own medicine, thank you very much.)

This reminds me of many late afternoons in college, hanging around at random places in the campus after class, to ogle at the miniscule number of cute boys around. (Judge me if you have to - I was only normal. And I studied in an engineering college with too few normal men - most of them were either too dumb or too geeky.) So I go down for a break, my head about to burst because of the migraine, and I see my newfound (?) cute boy in his dark blue shirt, surrounded by a bunch of other people, my cute boy talking passionately about what I think is advertising and market research and statistics (which is a good thing because I am not particularly enthralled by his gyaan sessions - I don't even understand half the things he says.) and I think to myself, "Not bad! Not bad at all!"

Who says you grow old/ boring/ unromantic/ stop doing stupid things after you get married? I, for one, don't.

P.S. - Last night I saw the new Uninor ad and had a complete analysis ready for R while he munched on his bhindi masala. And boy was he impressed. With himself. For managing to get me interested in what has always been his domain in our household. I generally stick with whining and cribbing and talking about more important existential questions like "what the hell is wrong with the world". (Exaggeration comes naturally to me, you must have figured that out by now.)

P.S. 2. I HAD to tell you this. I have already made it obvious that I find wedding invitation websites extremely cheesy. As if that is not all, I just saw one such website that said "We still didn’t knew it was fate trying to bring us together each time." among other things. Needless to add, my red marker is at work.

The Auntie Chronicles/ The Goddess of Small Things

Because I couldn't decide which one of the two headings was more accurate.

(If you are still pretending to be the kind of wife that doesn't need to be responsible for anything around the house (like I had been until a couple of months ago), just close this tab!)

(In almost 7 years of REGULAR blogging, I have finally managed to churn out my most boring, mundane, I-had-cornflakes-for-breakfast-it-is-a-sunny-day post EVER.)

Of late the quality of my posts has gone down the dumps? Why? I haven't had much to say. And things that I want to say are either already said on someone else's blog or I don't have the time (I have surprised myself at how often I have said this recently. Am I complaining? Hardly!) or the patience to write. Life has been awesomely and brilliantly busy of late, what with loads of interesting work, stuff around the house to be taken care of, so much of it carried over to weekends, and all the shopping and planning to do this month - an anniversary and a birthday (not mine!) and Fathers Day (call me cheesy, I celebrate everything) and a long overdue visit from my sis - I simply love June! R has been very busy at work, and I am finally beginning to understand what people mean when they say that handling both home and work isn't easy. However it is definitely not rocket science. I think we are managing quite well. So far so good!

One of the most awesome things in the world is to reach office in the morning and realise you are the first person to walk in. The first cup of office coffee in such amazing, and such unlikely silence is definitely the best way to kick start to the day. Highly recommended! There was a time when reaching office that early was a regular thing. Primarily to escape the rush hour crowd in the local train. But it's easy to do that when you have a bowl of steaming hot oats (yuck!) and a cup of chai waiting for you on the dining table when you decide to bless the world with your freshly bathed, awesome smelling self :P But now mornings are a rush - with R deciding to take on the world by cleaning every corner of the house early in the morning, and the overcome-with-guilt me try to match up by pretending to be very busy making chai. LOL! A word of gyaan - refusing to boot the laptop in the morning helps! No Facebook. No blogs. No gmail. Not that early in the morning for sure! Sigh! When did I grow up? :-)

I have a saviour for my morning rush - the new maid. Parbati. This girl from Nepal. I feel bad for her - she has just moved to Bangalore from her village in Nepal. She can't read time, speaks broken Hindi, and looks like the quintessential kanchi. I wonder just how lost she must feel in the big bad world. Tells me though that her husband helps her in the kitchen. Men have evolved. Such a pleasant far cry from Ma quietly listening to her domestic helps' woes of a drunkard, violent husband every other morning, quietly because those women didn't seem like they particularly wanted to change anything. That said, if Sholay was made in our day and age, I would have told my kids "beta so jao, subah subah fir Parbati didi aa jaayengi". Seriously! No matter how much I plead with her, be stern with her, she will always, without fail, come before I can even think of getting out of bed. And once she is in, the busy body starts turning the kitchen upside down, and I am not sure what I was thinking when I decided to live in a house with an open kitchen. While this is blessing in disguise on weekdays, it can be such a pain in the wrong place on a weekend when all you want to do is sleep in late. And she can't cut vegetables for peanuts. And I must tell you than bhindi torn from the centre doesn't taste half as good as one that is cut well. She is worse than me! I still like her. I must be crazy!

Has everyone watched Rajneeti? Prakash Jha, my dad, and R are all from the same school. So my otherwise hardly-movie-watching dad (That's new though, he has spent many afternoons doing back to back in Regal and Metro) saw the movie on the Friday that it released. And I, of the FDFS fame, the only one in my extended khandaan that still believes in the wonders of FDFS, hasn't seen the movie yet! Surprisingly, I am not depressed about it. Where is the time? But this Saturday I will have to. I really can't lose my identity in this mad rush of life (big words, no?), so what if my identity is primarily defined by the number of Bollywood masala movies I have seen on the first weekend. There is Rajneeti and Toy Story, and I am waiting for IHLS. And I missed Well Done Abba and its DVD is almost never available on seventymm and Big Flix. So I have a whole lot of back log to catch up on.

I finally managed to finish 3 seasons of Frasier, and I am glad I did. Even Niles is coming around now, I quite like him. Never thought I would, when I saw him in the first season. Which reminds me. Has any one of you watched Heroes? I started, and I couldn't survive the first couple of episodes. Am I missing something? What's the the fuss about?

I read something in the newspaper today, and I am raving mad. Most of the times it doesn't take much for people to drive me there, but this one I think is not one of those small things I over react at. I read Jeffrey Archer's interview in Bangalore Times this morning. And unless it is proved that this is case of yellow journalism, I am not going to read his books again. And no, this is not an excuse for not reading his books because I don't understand them. I don't remember if I do, because the last time I read Jeffrey Archer was in class 10. I think someone forced it upon me, I have never been so fond of suspense thrillers (that's what he writes about, right? See how much I know about him?). Except maybe Daphne Du Maurrier. Not sure if I will manage to survive her now too. See Mr Archer? You don't like India (I guess you are secretly afraid we will drive you back to your high and mighty phoren country, the Englishman that you are.), I don't like you. Case closed. Give me an Indian writing in English. Or Enid Blyton. Any day.

Which reminds me. I managed to finish all my Malory Towers. All the books I had that is. One of these days I will go book shopping again. Any recommendations? I already told you my preference, so. It was fun to revisit Darrel Rivers and group again. I never knew that the second series of Malory Towers was released last year - with Darrel's sister Felicity taking the lead. As is the case with all sequels, it is not as good as the first series. But the characters are nearly the same as Darrel's batch. The names are new though. So it helps. I liked it. There's nothing to not like.

Have you been watching the soccer WC? I prefer Indian Idol! But I gave in to the pressure after my FB homepage was full of self confessed "soccer freaks" (that only remember they like the game during WC - I think they watch it for the WAGs. I know all the abbreviations, see?). Then of course are the genuine ones. Some of my friends. They bunked/ reconsidered taking university exams because they had matches to watch all night. I say this passion for soccer in Indians comes from the lack of pressure to win. Cricket has been disappointing recently. Anyway coming back to succumbing to the pressure of watching soccer. I tried last night. But slept off. In a match between Italy and Paraguay, even I know who will win. Not Paraguay by a long shot, right? Let me go check. Ah! It was a draw. What do I know about soccer?

Am I the only one who has extremely annoying relatives on Facebook? The ones who dispense random gyaan that sounds like the back cover of the cardboard bound registers we used to scribble math sums on in school? Quotes on leadership and other such trivial matters in status updates. It gets annoying, doesn't it?

While we are on relatives (and friends), I have a new pet peeve. Why can't a married woman be low without being asked if she had had a fight with her husband? And why can't she fall sick without people asking her or secretly wondering if she is "carrying". Don't get me wrong, my fights with R make me miserable. But it helps that our fights don't last longer than a couple of hours. And no, we don't pretend to be the samajhdaar couple that doesn't sleep without resolving the fight. When we fight, we fight. And we are secure enough to know that neither of us will run off in the night if we don't resolve the fight before sleeping off at night. That said, if I am upset for a couple of days at a stretch, slim chance it is because of a fight. And if I am unwell for over 3 days, please be aware that I am absolutely non-immune to running noses and violent coughs. And much as I want to have kids, I am not "carrying". Yet.

Why can't we enjoy monsoons and pakodas and chai and all the bliss that comes with it without running the risk of catching a cold/ coughing for an entire week/ getting stuck in traffic for hours/ auto drivers demanding the moon to take you home (YOUR home, you dirty people!). Not that I have to deal with auto drivers too often now. Just saying. So the other day I was galivanting in the scorching heat, when the weather suddenly took a turn, and it rained. And the next day I was coughing and sniffing and considering going on sick leave. I didn't. But I remembered another era. When a bunch of us would take internal exams, then sit at a friend's house till 2:30 am, and then ride all the way to Mahabaleshwar on bikes that didn't have gears (to start with), and back, all in a matter of 15 hours. During the crazy Maharashtra monsoons. 15 hours of being drenched on the road. On bikes. I can only imagine how the wheel of the world would stop turning if I did that now. 2 hours, may be. 3 is good too. Not getting drenched and going on abnormally long drives in the pretty red ride we have - that would be something! We are getting old. OK R would not like it if I said this about him on a public forum - he is still my young and dashing Ranchi ka Rajkumar ;) I am getting old. Am I complaining, still? Not in the least :-)

Speaking of weather, I have been unbelievably lazy the last few days. I have been going through the motions of getting up, getting dressed, getting to work, cooking, and all that. But at the back of my mind I can only think of sleeping. Sleeping like there is no tomorrow. Sleeping at the risk of missing the little pleasures of watching the little maid of Nepal/ Mr Frasier Crane/ life in action. And I am not the only one. At the entrance of my office building, I see 3 dogs every single day. They don't move. I am not kidding you. You can do a hop, skip, jump, and they will just about open their eyes, look at you sleepily, and go right back to sleep. Ok now I am talking non sense.

Speaking of office buildings, is it just me that finds these sprawling tech parks a tad bit obscene, to say the least? I mean I am all for a comfortable office to work in. But the amount of land that is wasted on making these sprawling campuses in a country where wealth is not justly (that's a word, I just checked) distributed at all, for people to code comfortably, or make pretty PPTs, or whatever. It's all good. But whatever happened to that thing called practicality? Usability? Usefulness? I don't even particularly like the sprawling building societies, but I don't think I will be able to help living in one of them. I can avoid working in suburban tech parks. So far I have managed quite well. I like to be in the middle of all the action. Know what I mean? It is more about perspective I guess. The same contrasts make sure I am always in awe of Bombay. I respect Bombay for the same contrasts that I dislike Bangalore for. Do I have to think fairly all the time? Or at all? Do I even need to start explaining that I am right? Of course I am!

Coming back to my love for Bangalore (I mean it. This city is by far the best I have lived in. Even Bombay had its faults. I live in a house/ city where I can get pin drop silence when I want to, just when I want to. That says more about Bangalore vs Bombay than anything ever will), the weather is magical. My sister is coming here in a little over 2 weeks. And I have a birthday to celebrate and plan for in exactly 1 week+1 day.

Life's good? Couldn't be better!

:-)

P.S. - Did you actually read this load of crap? You must really love me!

Frozen in time

There are few things more awesome than a rainy evening, thunderstorm, some chilled beer in the balcony, power cut (and a careless watchman who doesn't start the loud generator), songs that mean a lot to you, me, and us. And long and winding conversation about yesterday, day before, last year, 10 years ago... And the years to come.

A moment that was frozen in time, and was stashed away in the safest locker of my memory :)

Sometimes when we talk..

After a long day at work, she is rambling on and on and on about Papa John's. After a monologue that must have lasted an eternity (at least for him), all he says is, "Papa John toh mummy kaun".

Needless to add, he didn't really hear anything she said... And that is often the case with her eternity long monologues :-P

On an aside, did I ever tell you that I absolutely LOVE Windows 7? Mainly because it boots super fast.

If gluttony is sin, shoot me. Now.

It's a Monday morning, and I have the entire week's work piled right in front of me already. And all I can think of is why and how I have been managing to eat like I haven't eaten in my entire life. 14 rosogullas at a Bihari wedding when I was 6 notwithstanding. Here's how the story goes...

We don't eat great food on weekdays, great by box meal standards, but not really awesome. So Saturday was full of samosas and pasta and maalpua and Dairy Milk and Breezer. One needs to indulge once in a while, is what we tell ourselves. Every other day.

And then came Sunday. It started with Onjus Fruit Punch. See when we like something, we tend to overdo it. And it's just juice, just how bad can it be for you? And then came lunch. Box meals are ghar ka khana, but they don't taste like hamaare ghar ka khaana, and I was cooking a colourful meal after ages, so it had to be a big spread. How often do we indulge ourselves anyway? So we ate a 3 course Bihari lunch - nearly all food-colours and food types you can imagine. It was healthy. OK it was as healthy as 2 people eating ALL THAT food can be.

Evening came, and it rained... And the weather was too nice for us to step out of our cozy little balcony. So for the sake of ol' times, we polished off a piece each of nearly everything McDonald's India delivers with 2 and a half Tuborgs each. And then had some rich chocolate ice cream, Vienetta if you really have to know.

Someone count all those calories. But please don't tell me. Someone stop me! Like I just told you, I always seem to justify all this food. But what justification can I give when the next time someone asks me, "Where do you see yourselves in 5 years?" and the only answer I will know is "35 kgs up.. Give or take 5. Fit enough to walk to the neighbourhood Iyengar Bakery." Where am I going? Where's my discipline? Where's Ma? I miss how she used to force papeetas and oats down my throat - so much of it during my Bombay years that I now I almost puke at the sight of that horrible tasting, ugly food. But I miss it now. At least I didn't have guilt trips on otherwise lovely Monday mornings. Nonsense!

A typical romantic evening in the life of the Manis

I can hear the rhythm of the rain outside, it's a beautiful evening, balmy if you will (what on earth does that word mean anyway?). The Mishra-Manis are merrily preparing for a grand pasta and maalpua dinner (yes, yes, we will most probably treat you to such random combinations when you visit us. We like to spread joy to those we like.), and I'm singing my favourite Debbie Reynolds' of all times... Tammy.. Tammy.. Tammy is in love!

And then Smartie says, "pichhle janam mein aap morni hongi lagta hai"

To which I give him my trademark, "Hain!?"

Baarish hote hi naachne lag jaati hain...

*Sigh* Such is life.

Curtains drop.

P.S. - On an unrelated note, this is my problem. I know now. And I'm not even a CEO or anything remotely close to that! Marshall Goldsmith - the man who can make even lessons in self improvement sound sensible without sounding annoying. I love him!

Life... Tell it like it is, Part N

After a very, very long day at work and home...

She: Do all forms of tobacco hit?
He: Ummm... Ya.
She: Gul too?
He: Ummm... Ya. Zzzzz.

10 minutes later..
She: You know... I think the most romantic line I have ever heard is "You are my co ordinate"
He: Sounds like arithmetic.
She: NOOOO!!! It's like "I am here. Now. THIS defines my existence. YOU are my co ordinate"... Know what I mean?
He: Kaun bola ye line?
She: Hum bole.
He: ZZZZZZZZZ.

This place is not quite right for the curious type. Even worse for the hopeless, innovative romantics :P

But that of course was made up for today :)

Life... Tell It Like It Is Part 1

Just realised... Someone to love, a stiff drink, and good ol' metallica crooning Nothing Else Matters and Turn The Page melt all your uncertainties away.

And brand new offer letters with bigger numbers from places I REALLY belong, help too! :D

Here I am... On the road again

P.S. Totally addicted to blogging all over again. Thanks to the amount of time (in spite of work) I have these days. More on this later ;)

Say it like it is...

So last evening I launched into a random monologue about how Bombay is the city of dreams. And quite literally so. And I went on to prove this with examples like Amitabh Bachchan and Raju Srivastav. And after 10 minutes of romanticizing aloud about Bombay, I mumbled out of nowhere, "But Calcutta is the City of Joy...."

Smartie says, "Yaa.. Ajoy, Bijoy, Sujoy".

And I knew he didn't really hear much. Yet another Gulzaar Moment.

Is it srange that I like it this way? :)

Suresh Wadkar, Bhupendra, and I sing together...
"Koi manachalaa gar pakad legaa aanchal
Zaraa sochiye aap kyaa kiijiyegaa
Lagaa de agar badhke zulfon mein kaliyaan
To kyaa apnii zulfein jhatak diijiyegaa"

Smartie says - Jhatak dijiyega??? Arre ap toh usko patak dijiyega!

Let's just say Smartie knows me well :P