Sunday, November 8, 2009

I realised last night that at this point in time I am surrounded by a bunch of some of the most awesomest women I have ever met. And it's such a comforting feeling to know that a lot of women in this world, irrespective of their age and marital status, want the same things in life. I have lost some dear friends recently, because I wanted things in life that they didn't believe in. And what they wanted in life was a little too much to handle for the occasionally judgmental me. There, I said it!

Funnily, my tryst with being the only woman I knew in my age group who extremely strongly believed that family and marriage were important for a happy, "well rounded" life, began at a bachelorette party. My own :) It feels like life has come a full circle in 7 months. ONLY! And it's a very comforting feeling. To know that mine is not a green tinted 60's mind, with due apologies to Mr Big.

I also realised yesterday just how much I want to be a mother. And how strongly I believe that R and I will make good parents. Last night I met a 2 year child, my boss' son. And in today's time and age of junk food, busy parents, and a little too much exposure, I couldn't believe how well grounded a child could be! Has the vocabulary almost as awesome as Shakespeare himself, and has attended 2 bachelorette party in 2 years of his existence, the child is amazingly well mannered. And obedient. Oh boy obedient! My mom strictly believes that the more you shield your children from things (she laughs at the idea of parents disconnecting their cable TV connection during their children's board exams!), higher are the children's chances of getting drawn towards things that our society labels "wrong". As long as you know you don't need to hide things from your children (and the opposite is also true), there's no reason why parents and children can't have a healthy relationship. All they look for is a friend, both parents and kids. Some of the most obnoxious kids I know are the ones who are shielded. There's nothing more futile than to keep a child away from things he's bound to see/ know in life. This way or that. So yes, I am going to be a great mom. But that said, I think we need at least 5 more years of exposure and disciplining before we can become parents, so no high hopes! :P

There's more. A little while ago while I was reading through a blog post and I realised was just how much I have become capable of crying! I have been through things in life that made me miserable. Yet now that I am truly happy (touchwood!), with a life and job I quite like and wouldn't trade for anything in the world, my water works start at the drop of a hat. I start a fight, I cry. Someone else starts a fight, I still cry. I watch a movie, I cry. I watch Big Boss, I cry!! I read a colleague's blog post, I cry. I miss mom, I cry. I feel generally good about life, yes you guessed it, I STILL cry. I wonder what brings it on. But all said and done, I'd rather cry than have a life any different than the one I do right now.

I feel good. I really do :)

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